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  I leaned forward, mimicking that wicked smile of his, and whispered, “No dice.”

  There was a pause before he threw his head back and slapped a hand over his chest. “Oh, you break my heart, Barbara.”

  “I have someone else warming my bed tonight.” I grinned as I looked over at the bachelorette party. “Kendall!” I called out. Turning her head quickly, her blond hair whipped around, and she practically ran to the bar.

  “I was wondering when you’d call. Although, I expected you to pick up the phone.” She tossed her glossy hair back.

  “Why wait when I have your cute ass here?”

  She giggled. Too damn easy.

  “What do you say, Kendall? My place or yours?”

  Those pearly whites glistened, and I thought her cheeks were going to burst with excitement. “Yours. Let me just tell my girlfriends I won’t be going home.” She winked and practically skipped to her friends.

  I turned to Fen. “And that is how you do it.”

  “Touché, Barbara, touché.”

  I closed the bar at nearly three in the morning, locked up, and shut off the blinking “open” sign. Leaning against the door, I watched Kendall as she danced around the empty bar with the music humming in the background and filtered between tables like a pixie in a meadow. Her hair came down to her mid-back, and she spun around one more time before facing me. Her eyes pierced me with a knowing look that told me everything we’d be doing tonight.

  She tossed her pink sash on the ground, her shirt following.

  “Upstairs,” was all I said as I tilted my head toward my second-floor apartment. She bit that damn lip again and ran up to my place as if I’d chase behind her. Reaching over the countertop, I grabbed the first bottle my hands touched—bourbon, my favorite—and uncapped it. Taking a swig, I followed the little human up the stairs.

  2

  Flashback

  My legs were wobbly, and each bone in my body trembled from exertion. It took every ounce of strength to keep going and hold my sword firmly as I fought for my life. My shoulders heaved as my lungs pulled for more air.

  “A valkyrie does not surrender!” Kara yelled as she slashed her sword toward me. “A valkyrie does not show mercy!” I swerved to the left and stumbled backward. “And lastly, a valkyrie does not show weakness!” she shouted, her foot connecting with my chest and knocking me down.

  Sand flew up around me as I landed on my behind, my sword tumbling somewhere nearby. I’d lost control of my weapon. Ignoring the pain in my tailbone from the fall, I closed my eyes in shame. I wasn’t getting any better.

  Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes. The tip of Kara’s sword was aimed right between my eyes, a mere hair’s breadth away. I gulped.

  “You’re dead,” she said in disgust, pulling the sword away.

  I released the breath I’d been holding, my chest deflating.

  The clinking of metal resonated in the practice arena where my sisters sparred, dust flying up as their feet shuffled. I had to cover my eyes. With burning arms and sweat gliding down my back, I stood, shaking as the adrenaline subsided, and picked up my sword. It was heavy in my hand—not only because I was tired but also because I still wasn’t strong enough to handle such a powerful weapon. I was younger than most of the valkyries in the battalion, but I’d been the exception. My sisters saw something in me I still hadn’t seen in myself.

  “Kara,” I called out to my sister as she returned her sword to the weapons rack. She didn’t answer me right away. Kara was the valkyrie-in-command. It was a privilege to personally train with her. No one ever had.

  She was beautiful. The tips of her long, red hair hit the top of her bottom, and the sides were braided and clipped in the back. She was the fiercest of them all. Having led regions into battle, she hadn’t lost a war yet. And I was her prodigy.

  “What?” she said abruptly. Her back still toward me, she tilted her head and looked over her shoulder.

  I took a few breaths before saying, “Why am I here and not training with the other girls in my class?”

  Kara slowly turned to face me, and her expression was stoic just like a valkyrie should be—without feeling.

  “Rule number one: never doubt yourself,” she said. “Once you do, you’re already dead.”

  “I’m not doubting myself. I just want to know.”

  “Do not worry about such trivial things,” Kara scoffed and snatched the sword from my hand as if I didn’t deserve to touch it. Maybe I didn’t. “On to the second part of our training.”

  I’d been sparring with Kara and our sisters, who were now full-fledged valkyries. The ones who were centuries old had already seen war, which meant their training was much more rigorous, more intense. My sisters in my age group went through the traditional route of training that wasn’t so advanced or hands-on.

  We hadn’t done anything but fight, so a knot built in my stomach as I wondered what other training we’d be doing. The Hall of Valhalla, the compound where my sisters and I resided, was filled with endless hallways. I’d only seen a fraction of all the rooms in the Hall, but one thing was for sure: Kara was taking me someplace that was restricted. Instead of going west of the arena, she headed north toward the tunnels. We were never allowed into the tunnels.

  “Uh … Kara,” I muttered as I wrapped my arms around my midsection. The air turned to ice and I shivered. The gray concrete walls were narrow, and I felt claustrophobic. Torches lined both sides to lead the way.

  “What?”

  “Where are we going?” I shuffled behind her, trying to keep up.

  Looking over her shoulder, she smirked. “You’ll see when we get there.”

  The look she gave me made the knot in my stomach multiply, and I had to fight every part of me that wanted to run upstairs, back to my side of the compound, and go back to training with my sisters.

  Moans and grunts filled the air, and an odd feeling came over me. A tingle in my abdomen that traveled to my groin intensified as the sounds grew louder.

  We came to a stop at a metal door with a small window at the top. Kara was in front of it, making it so I couldn’t see inside.

  “Fighting is but half the battle,” Kara started. “As valkyries, we need to hone many talents besides killing.”

  “What else must I learn?” I whispered, the uneasiness in my voice palpable.

  Her gaze narrowed, and the corners of her lips tipped up.

  “There is reading and collecting souls, strategy, and my personal favorite, the art of seduction,” she said with a smile as she opened the door.

  She held it open for me to walk in first, and my body stiffened once I entered. The walls were the color of spilled blood, and a fire lit the room, its light flickering against the crimson.

  A wolf’s fur was on the ground in the middle of the room, the coat a bright white. Such luxuries were rare in Valhalla.

  In the center laid a man and a woman. Their bodies were bare as they laid there, waiting for someone—for us.

  I gulped. “What is this?”

  “Our second-biggest asset is the manipulation of man. Our beauty ensnares them, but we must know how to use our bodies to have them fully in our grasps.”

  My face felt hot as I swallowed a few times. I couldn’t look away. Their hands roamed across each other’s bodies, their fingers teasing each other and touching parts I knew were forbidden.

  “I don’t know, Kara …” I turned to her. “I’m not ready for this.”

  “Yes, you are. Now go on. I’ll be right outside the door waiting until you’re finished.”

  I didn’t move. My feet had melted to the ground, and I was paralyzed. My body shook as I worried my hands.

  Kara gave me a push, and I stumbled forward. “Take off your clothes. Stop stalling.”

  My head whipped to my sister, my honey-brown eyes wide. “W-What?”

  “Take. Off. Your. Clothes.”

  With clammy hands, I slid off the straps of my buckskin dress. It fell on th
e floor in a pile atop my bare feet. I shivered as a cold breeze covered my skin and hardened my breasts.

  “You’ll be fine,” Kara murmured as she left the room, shutting the metal door. I flinched when I heard the lock snap in place. My sister looked at me through the window, her eyes cold and detached. If I wanted to be a valkyrie, this was what I had to do.

  I nodded, and she walked away, disappearing from the window. Taking a few deep breaths, I turned to the man and woman waiting for me. Their eyes were glazed and their smiles lazy. Stiffly, I approached the rug and fell to my knees. In a slow crawl, I knelt between them.

  “It’s okay.” The woman smiled as her hand trailed to the man’s hip and she grabbed his manhood. “Watch what I do and follow. Come, don’t be shy.”

  My eyes were wide, and my insides quivered. She was so nice, her voice melodic, and it made me come closer. My hands trembled as they replaced hers.

  “Good,” she whispered. “Stroke him, but do not squeeze too tightly.”

  The man leaned on his elbows and grinned as he watched me. He jerked at my touch.

  I flinched. “I don’t want to do this.” My voice cracked. “I—”

  “It’s okay,” the woman said kindly. She came closer to me, her hand trailing over my thigh, between my legs. “It’ll be okay.”

  I felt something I couldn’t explain, and I eventually nodded hesitantly.

  My hand reached for him again. He was hard, but his skin was soft at the same time. With each motion of my hand, noises escaped the man, and when her fingers moved between my thighs, I moaned.

  I didn’t understand what I was feeling, and I didn’t want it to stop.

  “There you go,” the woman said. “You’re a natural.”

  I spent the whole night in that room in the tunnels. I felt dirty and … something else. I didn’t know what it was just yet. Kara said it was pleasure—an emotion valkyries rarely felt, and they only experienced it when necessary. I wasn’t sure if I liked it, but I would have to do it the next night and the night after that until I learned.

  Hildr shot up in her bed. “How was it?”

  We shared a room in the section of the hall where all our sisters in our age group resided. Hildr and I have shared a room for a half-century—it was almost all our lives. She was my best friend.

  “How was what?” I said quietly. It was lights out, and the older valkyries routinely checked our rooms to make sure we were asleep.

  “You know,” she paused. “The tunnels.”

  I shot up and looked over at her. “Does everyone know?”

  A small candle had been lit and placed on a table between our beds.

  She nodded, and my face flushed. It felt like such a private act, and to have it known by all my sisters felt like a violation.

  “It was … different.”

  “Did it hurt? Some of the girls are saying it is the worst pain you’ll ever endure.” Her big eyes glistened in the dark.

  I was glad we were encompassed in darkness so she couldn’t see me blush. Initially, I felt pain, but it didn’t last long. After a while, I was enjoying myself. I was embarrassed to admit it.

  “You don’t feel it for too long,” I mumbled.

  “It’s because you’re stronger than us. I knew that was why Odin chose you.”

  “Odin?” I raised a brow. “He chose me to train with Kara?”

  “Of course. Didn’t you know?”

  I kept quiet as I laid back in bed. Our father had a soft spot for me, but we hadn’t interacted much for him to notice my talents. Why didn’t Kara want to tell me?

  “No one ever said anything. I just do as I’m told,” I said stoically.

  “Yeah,” Hildr sighed, “it’s why you’ll be one of the greatest valkyries in history.”

  Hildr had more faith in me than I did in myself. I had told Kara I didn’t doubt myself, but I secretly did. I could feel something deep inside me changing—whether it was for the better, I didn’t know. Today was just the beginning. My innocence was being ripped away and I was scrambling to hold on to at least one thread of who I was. Being a strong and powerful valkyrie was all I had ever wished for, but I wasn’t sure I felt the same way.

  “Have you seen Freya?” Hildr interrupted my thoughts. I shook my head even though she couldn’t see me, and she continued. “She’s like a whole other person. Ever since she graduated from training, her eyes are dead inside. It’s almost scary.”

  I imagined Hildr shivering in her bed as she spoke. None of the girls were ever the same once they become full-fledged valkyries, and I was almost there.

  3

  Present Day

  A buzzing sound stirred me awake, and I reached across my bed. The sheets were cold. Empty. When I attempted to stand, my head throbbed with a massive hangover.

  “Holy shit,” I grumbled and smashed my face on the pillow. The buzzing continued, but I was in too much pain to move.

  I’d sent Kendall home without breakfast, to her dismay. She was a decent lay, but with everything I’d consumed, I could barely remember anything from the night before. I took my ass back to sleep after she left.

  Taking a deep breath, I rolled out of bed with a groan and leisurely stretched my back and arms, feeling the two massive scars that ran from my shoulder blades to my lower back—where my wings once were. I’d ripped them out myself and had refused to let them grow back by taking fire to my skin and sealing them up for good. In doing so, it disfigured my skin, leaving thick, mangled scars in their wake.

  With my eyes barely open, I grabbed my cell phone from my nightstand and answered.

  “Hello?” I mumbled as I rubbed my eyes.

  “About time you answer,” Thumper grunted. “You’re late. You still want your usual?”

  I pulled the phone away from my ear and looked at the time on the screen. It was way past noon. Almost two o’clock.

  “Shit,” I muttered and put the phone back to my ear. “Give me twenty minutes.”

  We hung up the call without saying goodbye.

  I shuffled to the kitchen, where I grabbed a beer from the fridge and rinsed my morning breath in the sink. I was all class.

  Taking a quick shower, I threw on some clothes, grabbed my backpack, and headed out. Typically, I’d stay home and sleep some more before my shift, but I had an appointment—one I never missed.

  It’d only been two months since I moved to Oregon from Maine. Every few years I made the transition to a new city to avoid suspicion from the humans. I never aged, and they noticed after a while. I don’t know why I chose Portland, but the West Coast called to me after roaming the East Coast for the last two decades. Nonetheless, I liked it here. It was quiet and simple. That was all I needed.

  The wind blew my brown, shoulder-length hair across my face, and I pulled it back with a hair tie. It was a risk for a valkyrie to keep her long hair, so I’d chopped it off the moment I realized I’d be stuck in Midgard—on earth—forever. Now no one can control me.

  It was sixty degrees, and fall was just beginning. Wearing my forest-green utility jacket, I popped the collar to protect my neck from the wind as I walked a quarter-mile to the bus stop. I’d made it just in time and didn’t have to wait long. Once it pulled up, I headed for the back of the bus.

  “Took you long enough,” Thumper said as I slid into the seat beside him, placing my backpack between us on the ground. “I was starting to worry.” He gave me the side eye.

  I ignored him and looked straight ahead. “You got my request?” I’d asked for an increase.

  He let out a sigh. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t raise suspicion. Boss will think you’re dealing.”

  “He doesn’t have to worry about that.”

  “You sure?” He turned his head to me. “People talk, and you’re not too quiet.”

  I snorted. “Tell The Boss to stop sending goons to my bar and maybe they’ll stop talking.”

  Thumper was a chubby guy from Hazelwood who worked for a drug dealer based outside of Portl
and. No names were ever given, and I never asked for them. All I cared about was getting my product in a timely manner.

  “I’m surprised I don’t get a discount. I am your best customer.” I grinned as I turned to him. “I’m not getting the best customer service here.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Funny. The Boss is generous, but he isn’t charitable.” Thumper pulled a plastic bag from his bomber jacket and swiftly placed it inside my open backpack.

  “How you go through a whole stash in a week is beyond me. How are you not dead?” he mumbled.

  “I’m immortal.”

  He peered at me through his peripheral vision. “Right … well the Boss wants you to do him a favor.”

  “And I want to win the lottery,” I said with sarcasm. “We don’t always get what we want.”

  “This is serious.” He turned to me. “He won’t take no for an answer this time.”

  I sighed. “I don’t work for criminals.”

  “That’s a bit hypocritical, ain’t it?”

  Of course it was, but that was beside the point. I wasn’t getting involved in illegal human dealings. They were a waste of my time and skills. They didn’t know I was a valkyrie, but news of my fights at the bar with his goons had made its way to The Boss, and I’ve had multiple invitations to work for him. I’d turned him down every time. It was never an issue until now.

  “There’s no escaping this,” Thumper said. “What the Boss wants, he gets.”

  Whipping my gaze to him, I whispered, “I don’t give a damn. If that’s how it’s going to be, I’ll find a new supplier. You can tell your boss that.”

  I clutched my backpack as the bus sped over a speedbump. I was losing patience, so I pulled the lever to notify the driver I was getting off on the next stop.

  “Your funeral,” he muttered.

  We sat in silence until the bus squealed to a stop and its doors whooshed open. I slung my backpack over my shoulder and hopped off the bus.

  I didn’t look at him as I left, but I heard him whisper, “Watch your back.” I didn’t need the warning. Humans didn’t frighten me.